Jack & Jill took a break from re-writing mission statements to have a power lunch and to discuss their relationship.

Jack: I think we should recontextualize our situation.

Jill: Agreed.

Jack: Excellent.

Jill: I tried to incentivize.

Jack: I appreciate the initiatives, if not the methodologies.

Jill: Did you not refer back to the schemas?

Jack: I did. I think the problem is that we differed on our views as to whether or not they were mission-critical.

Jill: I expected a convergence of solutions.

Jack: I expected more proactivity.

Jill: How is the new Blackberry treating you?

Jack: Excellent.

Jill: I think that I expected more of a frictionless transition, vis-a-vis our romantic paradigm.

Jack: I concur.

Jill: Are you satisfied with your ROI?

Jack: No. You?

Jill: No.

Jack: I am surprised by my own lack of functionality.

Jill: My hopes were for a robust, yet transparent, system.

Jack: Yes! With a synergistic partnership.

Jill: I've always seen myself as a bit of an envisioneer.

Jack: We've tried to optimize and revolutionize --

Jill: And we've tried to strategize and reinvent --

Jack: Exactly.

Jill: So, that is it?

Jack: That is it.

Beat.

Jack: At the end of the day, do you think it was our lack of a holistic approach that did us in.

Jill: Well, that and the fact that it was like pulling teeth to get you to go down on me.

Labels: short fiction